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What I want for Father's Day

Do you remember that Cosby Show episode on father's day where Cliff (the dad) wanted his kids to put some thought into a father's day gift?  He got out all of the cheesy father's day gifts they had given to him over the years and showed them how ludicrous they were.  This Sunday will be father's day, but not just any father's day for me.  This will be the first one without my dad.  

It is funny, my kids have been asking me what I would like for Father's Day.  I told them a paint sprayer would be nice, but honestly what I really would like to have is my dad (& mom) back.  Mom passed away from cancer a little over five years ago.  We went through the long decline and eventual passing as a family.  Dad left in a hurry this past March.

Dad had moved in with my family after mom's passing.  At times, it was difficult for everyone to adjust, but dad found his second home with us.  I know that he really missed mom and longed to go be with her, but I always told him that we weren't in a big hurry for that to happen.  Little did I know that Sunday, March 8, would be the last get together we would share.  We celebrated my youngest son's 17th birthday out at a Brazilian Churascuria.  It was Monday night that everything started going strange.  He complained about having no strength and needed some help to get up.  Then on Tuesday night, I was awoken to his urgent need for help as he was holding on to the wall in the restroom fearing that he would fall.  

We called 911 and the paramedics took him off to the hospital.  As quick as I could, I dressed and followed to the hospital.  He was in extreme pain in his shoulders and lacked strength.  I stayed up with him all night in the ER until they admitted him.  The doctors assured me that he was just a little dehydrated and the pain was probably arthritis.  Based on this, I elected to go with my high school basketball teams (I am an athletic director, and head coach) to the state playoffs and my wife would stay with dad.

Wednesday and Thursday were just a blur.  I spent a great deal of time doing team stuff and coaching.  It was nearly midnight on Thursday when I spoke to my wife about my dad's condition.  She said he wasn't doing well, but the doctors thought that there was no risk of anything life threatening at that time.  I told my wife to keep me posted and let my siblings know (especially my brother who lives in Taiwan).

Friday morning came as usual.  I was coaching my team in the state semi-final.  We were up 13 at the end of the 3rd quarter on a team that we had not beaten all season long.  As I huddled my players to instruct them on finishing the game, I was interrupted by my pastor who was in tears.  Nothing was making sense.  Then he told me my wife needed to speak with me immediately.  

I rushed outside and called my wife.  My wife proceeded to tell me that my dad had gone into renal failure and he was becoming non-responsive.  He was passing away and I was 3 hours from him.  This hit me lit a ton of bricks.  Dropping everything I proceeded to race home in a borrowed car.  I had not even traveled ten minutes down the road when I received another call.  Dad had passed away.  The rest of the trip was so hard.  I cried and cried and cried.  

Three hours later, I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital.  My wife, who had been there the whole time, walked me up to the room where his lifeless body lay.  The pain still hits me when I think about the fact that I was not there when he passed.

So, if you really want to know what I want for Father's Day, it would be to see my dad again.  
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  1. UnknownJune 15, 2015 at 10:26 PM

    Amen! You are so right...and one day we will be together with Mom and Dad again but until then I sure do miss them and think about them a lot. Thanks for sharing this. Love you!

    ReplyDelete

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